Life's Moments

I've been through my fair share of life's moments. Those curve balls you never see coming, or maybe you do but you don't have enough time to move out of the way, so you stay and take it. They've shaped me into the woman that I am, and am still becoming. I'm grateful for them, every last one. 

But I'd be lying if I said there weren't a few times along the way where I felt a little out of control. A little lost, in a sense. Okay, a good number of times. 

More recently, I've been struggling with the fact that I'm 22 and have yet to start my career. Hell. I haven't even made it halfway through college thanks to lack of money and some excuses, but why is beside the point. The fact is that is my current situation. I've been really hard on myself up to now. I've compared myself to everyone else who has graduated or started their careers, or looked as if they had their life together when in reality, I had no idea if what I saw on Facebook was accurate or not. But I didn't care. I saw these other people and would say to myself, "What are you doing Mel? Why don't you have your stuff together?!" I was harder on myself then necessary, but I think that's what pushed me to this point where I am currently. No, I don't yet have my degree, but I know that I'll get it some day. No, I haven't started my career just yet, but I'm pushing for it every single day because I know that I need to keep challenging myself if I want to do what I really want to do with MY life. 

I want to be a travel writer, at least that's what I think I want to be. In actuality, I have no idea if that's what I really want to do. I just know that I find the most joy doing those two things, writing and traveling. I don't have an exact idea of what I'm doing, but I do know that I'm trying. I'm writing every day and I'm constantly thinking of what I can do next to get me closer to whatever it is I should be doing. I decided to take some time off of school to focus more on my writing and traveling. It may not be how everyone else does it, but I can feel the goodness of this decision in my bones. And when you feel something in your bones... you're a fool to push that idea away. Simple as that. 

It's okay if you take a different road then that old friend you have on Facebook. Just know that their journey was for them, and yours is for you. Once you come to that realization, you become a little easier on yourself, and the lost feeling comes around a little less often.