I Want to Fall in Love

Love is something, isn't it? Something that can be described, in three words, or in none at all. Something that either makes too much sense, or doesn't make any sense in the slightest. Something that is entirely exciting, yet terrifying all wrapped up in one pretty package, with a large bow on top. I can't say that I know all that much about love. But from what I do know of it, I don't want to fall in love just once, twice, three times even. 

(Quote originally by Anthony Capella, used in The Age of Adaline)

I want to fall in love continuously, constantly, courageously. Over and over again. 

I want to fall in love with countless people. Places. Books. Movies. Songs. Memories. My life. Myself. 

Falling in love is such a beautiful journey, and I don't ever want to stop experiencing it. I want to embrace every version of it, in all of its entirety. I want to look back throughout my life and reminisce on each time I fell in love, and how beautiful it was each time. Whether it be the first time I experienced Zion and fell in love with it's one-of-a-kind beauty, or the first time I heard the song Pyro by Kings of Leon and felt it all the way down to my bones. 

Love is exceptional, and should be experienced for all that it is, and all that it can be. 

Happy Saturday! <3 

The Pressure to Be Happy

Since summer started, I've been inside more often then not. (some days, by choice, to stay out of this dreadful heat; some days, not by choice.) I decided to take a summer class so I could get back on track, while also completing an internship. To put it simply, I've been busy.

I came across an article recently titled, "The Pressure to Be Happy," while doing an assignment for my Psychology class and it really struck me. I was able to relate by the time I finished reading the first line. "What's your goal in life? To be happy. To find happiness."

I can recall saying those very words not too long ago. I just want to be happy. Truly happy. After reading this article, I came to a realization. People are molded and pressured into this belief that Happiness is the ONLY goal, when it shouldn't be.

Emotions are real, and it's okay to feel them. To experience them for all that they are, part of us. We're not always taught that, or we are, but we forget it along the road to adulthood. Like a lost suitcase.

We're told not to cry, or scream, or feel frightened. Well, sometimes it's okay to cry, scream, feel frightened! We often forget that these are normal emotions. Yes, I said normal! We wouldn't know what true happiness felt like without having experienced fear, or sadness, or anger.

So, I have new goals. I don't just want to experience happiness, I want to experience it all. Everything. I want to feel angry and upset and frightened and irritable and happy too. I want it all because it reminds me of what happiness is. And that is where I want my reality. I want to look in the mirror and not see a sculpture of a woman who's been doing all she can to try and be happy. I want to see a woman who has felt it all and despite that, still remembers what it's like to be happy. And comes back to that feeling more often then not.